Amazons In The Aisles

This is one of my favourite posts from a previous blog of mine.

I was going to call this post "Feral Female Terrorists In Our Shopping Centres" but I didn't because, if I had, I would have red flagged all the security services and agencies, nationally and internationally, who monitor the internet looking for any references to terror and those who inflict it. To those  people I say "Well done and keep it up. We rely on you".  I guess that red flagged everything anyway. Sorry guys.

I was, in fact, referring to the aggressive pushers of prams and shopping trolleys who absolutely know that it is their God given right to own whichever aisle they're pushing said pram or trolley at any given time. These Amazons are easily recognised by their resolute glare and stony faces as they unwaveringly aim their trolleys up and down the aisles while spending the family budget on necessities such as biscuits, soft drinks, chips and anything carrying a "Special" price tag, regardless of whether they really need it or not. Woe betide any luckless male that dares stand between them and a bargain. In fact, it is so dangerous that I think supermarkets and department stores should be compelled to carry liability insurance to cover injuries caused by unyielding Amazons.

I also need to warn people not to comment directly to the Amazons about their lack of manners. A quiet "rude bitch" will result in a screaming tirade that will not only be heard by every other shopper in a kilometre radius, it could also cause pacemakers to malfunction, heart attacks in the elderly, possible broken glass damage and a fast response from the store security, who will automatically take the Amazon's side and evict you from the store. This because the store security will not risk their own safety for yours. Smart people!

The answer to this potentially dangerous situation is to smile and give way to the Amazon. Apologise when she rams you with her trolley and remark on how cute her child is. Warning! Don't do the last one if you are dressed as a priest! Good luck.

Pathetic Political Correctness

OK, I admit it.
I hereby confess to being totally against the stupidity known as Political Correctness.

That does't mean that I'm homophobic ( just ask my gay friends), nor am I a misogynist. After all, I did marry a woman, who I'm devoted to. Come to think of it, I'm not racist either, as my Vietnamese wife will attest.

However, I do despise the tip toeing we are expected to do in our day to day communication, lest we offend someone who is of a different gender, a different race or has a different sexual bent (pun intended).

It is a fact that, in some way or another, we are all different from each other, so let's call it for what it is. There are men and women in most fields of employment. Policemen and policewomen, foremen and forewomen, waiters and waitresses, stewards and stewardesses (sometimes it's difficult to identify which is which here). Whoa! Was that homophobic?. Anyway, you get the idea.

Acknowledging a person's gender does NOT denigrate them. It just tells it like it is. Just a thought. The German language has the gender based der, die, das to identify all objects. Have they done away with der and die? Is everything or everyone just a das now? Who cares?

Recently, in a group of MEN and WOMEN, I told a couple of gay jokes. This horrified several of the group, in spite of the fact that the jokes were bloody funny. In my defence, the jokes were told to me by several of my gay friends who didn't care one iota that I retold them. When I related this incident to them (my gay friends), they fell about laughing.

I also told a very bad joke about a dwarf to a group men and women that I work with. I was told my one idiot that the term dwarf was derogatory. The bloody joke wouldn't have been remotely funny if I had referred to the dwarf as being a vertically challenged person.

All I'm saying, people is it's time to lighten up! Relax and stop tip toeing your way though conversations. If you offend someone, tough luck. Maybe they need to lighten up, too.

The Current State Of Play Between The USA And Europe?

As I see it.

The Parasites In Parliament

In my opinion, parliamentarians in general are parasites. They survive by eating from their publicly funded trough. Their sole purpose is to retain their overpaid jobs.To this end, they have no scruples or interest in the people they are supposed to serve. And Australian politicians are amongst the worst  in the world.

For example, they have spent a ridiculous amount of time debating the recognition of our indigenous people in the Australian Constitution. For years this huge problem has divided the parties and wasted a vast amount of time and money for no result. This is despite the overwhelming support of the Australian people for the change to occur. Not only that; the Australian aboriginals were the first Australians, predating European settlement by MORE THAN 40,000 YEARS! So, how dare our mongrel, parasitic politicians procrastinate, waste time and money and play their point scoring games over such a simple and important problem. As a tax payer and voter I say to all you political bloody parasites, "Get your grubby, fat fingers out of your collective fat arses and do your job, just for a change."

Also, if you really want to represent the majority of voters, legalise same sex marriage. Forget referendums and useless debates. JUST DO IT!

Having written this, I'm not holding my breath in expectation of these parasites doing anything remotely useful.